Shrektacular
Well it looks like we've traded in the fur of a little red squeaky-voiced beast (also known as Elmo) for the waxy (I suppose) green skin of one grouchy but lovable ogre with a Scottish accent (also known as Shrek).
I really think my sister is to blame for this. She introduced him to the lovely Dreamworks franchise - and now my son is hooked. He wants to watch Shrek constantly. All we have are 1 and 2 so I asked Chad to please buy Shrek the Third soon so we can add it to the rotation.
I've been bunking with him on a quite a few nights here lately - usually from around 4:00 AM to 6:30 when I have to get up and get ready for work. He'll wake up crying in the middle of the night and he'll say "Mommy sleep, Mommy sleep" -and pat the small space of bed next to him (and I stress the word small because it's a twin bed we're snuggled on - only it doesn't feel too much like snuggling when you wake up with a tiny foot in your face). Annnnnyway - so I would oblige. And so the other morning he was still asleep and I was trying to sneak out when he shot up in bed and said "I wanna watch Shrek!" Half asleep, mind you.
On Saturday morning I was awakened to the subtle pokings of a cold, plastic DVD case in my face. You can guess what the movie was.
"I wanna watch Shrek!"
On Sunday he went into a fit over Shrek when I told him we would watch it later.
"I wanna watch Shrek NOW! SHREK IS THE ONLY THING I WANT TO WATCH!"
Whoa! That's a nine word sentence spoken by a 2 1/2 year old! Pretty impressive - so I guess I can thank Shrek for that.
Tonight as we were pulling up little random Shrek clips on Youtube, he said:
"There's Shreky!"
He's become so emotionally attached that he's actually formed a pet name for the ogre.
The strangest, weirdest, most peculiar part of all of this is that I am NOT yet tired of Shrek. (KNOCKING AND BANGING ON WOOD AS HARD AS I POSSIBLY CAN.)
In fact - I find myself thinking about Shrek during the day - browsing the web for Shrek items, visiting eBay, etc. I even did some research about throwing a Shrek birthday party - and I know, I know - I should probably stop with all of the theme madness and just pick birthday colors or something instead of an involved theme - but I just keep thinking about how excited he would be.
I asked Chad to find and download the Shrek soundtracks. I find myself humming the songs throughout the day. And as a bonus, my child will know Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" by heart in a little while - and I love that aspect.
The end is near, though. I'll hear Donkey say "I'm gonna make waffles!" one more time and then I will snap. And then I'll want to reach for my own torch and pitchfork and attack the DVD player.
So I'm trying to keep him at bay on most days and save the Shrek fests for the weekend only. That's why I found some clips on Youtube to show him tonight - to sooth my little ogre's Shrek jones.
In other news - I am in desperate need of a dress to wear to Chad's brother's wedding which is officially (as of today) less than a month away! And I can't go sleeveless because my arms are so fat - even though it will be in Mexico and probably everyone will be going sleeveless and the bride will probably be strapless - since that seems to be what every bride wears these days (except for fat girls with mediport scars - but that was five years ago and I'm so over it - rolling eyes).
I'll start the shopping soon and I'm just not looking forward to it. This roo pouch that I have is out of control. It appears that I have, not one, but at least five baby roos stuffed in there. It's a very, very horrific site. And a dress may emphasize the problem. In fact, my stomach is why I haven't worn a dress since my wedding day. Which means one thing - foundation garment time. And we all know how horrible that can be. Well - at least some of us do. I've had some pretty comical moments in a dressing room flopping and squirming and trying to wriggle my way into a good girdle. My sister helped me on one occasion. It was a very grotesque Lucy and Ethel sort of moment. If video tapes of those moments were to ever surface, I seriously might consider killing myself.
It's just that bad.
So I did a little online shopping and I've seen a few things but I just don't know. The "body shaper" will be the key thing - so I probably need to get it first and bring it with me to the try-ons. Those things can be so expensive - a good one anyway. I don't know if I'll try Spanx or not. I mean, they look as thin as panty-hose. I'm thinking - uh - I need more than pantyhose with a little muscle for this disaster. I need like a flesh toned scuba suit to wear under this thing.
So I'm sure there will be some antics to report on after all of that mess goes down. Otherwise all is well.
I really think my sister is to blame for this. She introduced him to the lovely Dreamworks franchise - and now my son is hooked. He wants to watch Shrek constantly. All we have are 1 and 2 so I asked Chad to please buy Shrek the Third soon so we can add it to the rotation.
I've been bunking with him on a quite a few nights here lately - usually from around 4:00 AM to 6:30 when I have to get up and get ready for work. He'll wake up crying in the middle of the night and he'll say "Mommy sleep, Mommy sleep" -and pat the small space of bed next to him (and I stress the word small because it's a twin bed we're snuggled on - only it doesn't feel too much like snuggling when you wake up with a tiny foot in your face). Annnnnyway - so I would oblige. And so the other morning he was still asleep and I was trying to sneak out when he shot up in bed and said "I wanna watch Shrek!" Half asleep, mind you.
On Saturday morning I was awakened to the subtle pokings of a cold, plastic DVD case in my face. You can guess what the movie was.
"I wanna watch Shrek!"
On Sunday he went into a fit over Shrek when I told him we would watch it later.
"I wanna watch Shrek NOW! SHREK IS THE ONLY THING I WANT TO WATCH!"
Whoa! That's a nine word sentence spoken by a 2 1/2 year old! Pretty impressive - so I guess I can thank Shrek for that.
Tonight as we were pulling up little random Shrek clips on Youtube, he said:
"There's Shreky!"
He's become so emotionally attached that he's actually formed a pet name for the ogre.
The strangest, weirdest, most peculiar part of all of this is that I am NOT yet tired of Shrek. (KNOCKING AND BANGING ON WOOD AS HARD AS I POSSIBLY CAN.)
In fact - I find myself thinking about Shrek during the day - browsing the web for Shrek items, visiting eBay, etc. I even did some research about throwing a Shrek birthday party - and I know, I know - I should probably stop with all of the theme madness and just pick birthday colors or something instead of an involved theme - but I just keep thinking about how excited he would be.
I asked Chad to find and download the Shrek soundtracks. I find myself humming the songs throughout the day. And as a bonus, my child will know Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" by heart in a little while - and I love that aspect.
The end is near, though. I'll hear Donkey say "I'm gonna make waffles!" one more time and then I will snap. And then I'll want to reach for my own torch and pitchfork and attack the DVD player.
So I'm trying to keep him at bay on most days and save the Shrek fests for the weekend only. That's why I found some clips on Youtube to show him tonight - to sooth my little ogre's Shrek jones.
In other news - I am in desperate need of a dress to wear to Chad's brother's wedding which is officially (as of today) less than a month away! And I can't go sleeveless because my arms are so fat - even though it will be in Mexico and probably everyone will be going sleeveless and the bride will probably be strapless - since that seems to be what every bride wears these days (except for fat girls with mediport scars - but that was five years ago and I'm so over it - rolling eyes).
I'll start the shopping soon and I'm just not looking forward to it. This roo pouch that I have is out of control. It appears that I have, not one, but at least five baby roos stuffed in there. It's a very, very horrific site. And a dress may emphasize the problem. In fact, my stomach is why I haven't worn a dress since my wedding day. Which means one thing - foundation garment time. And we all know how horrible that can be. Well - at least some of us do. I've had some pretty comical moments in a dressing room flopping and squirming and trying to wriggle my way into a good girdle. My sister helped me on one occasion. It was a very grotesque Lucy and Ethel sort of moment. If video tapes of those moments were to ever surface, I seriously might consider killing myself.
It's just that bad.
So I did a little online shopping and I've seen a few things but I just don't know. The "body shaper" will be the key thing - so I probably need to get it first and bring it with me to the try-ons. Those things can be so expensive - a good one anyway. I don't know if I'll try Spanx or not. I mean, they look as thin as panty-hose. I'm thinking - uh - I need more than pantyhose with a little muscle for this disaster. I need like a flesh toned scuba suit to wear under this thing.
So I'm sure there will be some antics to report on after all of that mess goes down. Otherwise all is well.
posted by lovemydox at 9:12 PM
2 Comments:
I'm totally with you on the sleeveless front. And it's so hard to find a summer dress with sleeves!
The right undergarment might help with the smoothing but I worry it would be super hot, especially in Mexico.
I think the Summer Wrap Dresses might be flattering and you could accessorize them nicely to make them more 'festive'.
http://www.igigi.com/plus-size-clothing/Plus-Size-Dresses-5.html
I'm such a blouse & skirt girl. Let us know what you finally end up with!
I love my spanx. I have the "higher power" ones that go all the way from your lower thigh to jst under your bra. And they STAY UP. I was afraid they would roll down, but they don't. They are a bitch to get on, but once they are on, they are pretty comfortable and they hold everything in.
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